Clue Wagon » Tales of the Cluefree

Meet the One Whose Nails Ain’t Dry

Kerry Scott — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 14:00:37 +0000

A colleague who used to work retail was conducting interviews for seasonal help:

One particular applicant showed up ten minutes late, with a bag of fast food. During the interview, she shouted out answers to questions in between bites of her burger and went as far as to wipe her hands on the stack of applications that I had. Not only was she rude, but at the end of the interview I went to shake her hand and she said “Uh uh! I just got my nails done and they ain’t dry!”

Tales of the Cluefree appeared pretty much every Friday. This is the last one. Past stories are here.

Photo by darkpatator

Want to read this on your Kindle instead? Click here to subscribe.

Follow @ClueWagon

Meet the One Who Got Arrested During the Interview

Kerry Scott — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 14:00:17 +0000

Yeah, I know. It’s Thursday. I normally publish Tales of the Cluefree on Fridays, and I already have one all ready to go for tomorrow…but reader Natahle sent me the story she mentioned in the comments here, and it was too good to keep to myself.

Last year I was on the opening HR team of a new luxury resort. We held three job fairs a few months before opening and had thousands of people show up at each one of them. Applications kept pouring in after the job fair, and we were having a hard time getting anything but interviews done. We finally decided that we would only accept applications and conduct interviews three times a week during specific time frames.

Applicant hours were INSANE! Applicants would start showing up an hour before we officially accepted applications and we would usually start turning people away 10 minutes after applicant hours were supposed to be over. So, the candidates would fill out an application, turn it into our administrator to get logged, and wait for their interview. The back hallways of this hotel looked like we were hosting American Idol tryouts because so many people were lined up waiting for their interviews.

The HR office was very open, so we usually had 2 or 3 interviews going on at any given time. I had already interviewed around 20 applicants that day, and I was frustrated because I didn’t have anyone to pass on to a manager. Everyone I spoke with had given me a reason to pass on them, they wouldn’t make eye contact with me, they had huge gaps in their employment history and didn’t know how to explain them, their job history indicated they could only keep a job for a few weeks, two months at the most, etc. So, I passed on my last interview and called my next interview.

According to the time on his application, he had been waiting for an interview for a little over an hour. I called his name, introduced myself and extended my hand for a handshake… this is where he got off on the wrong foot… he used elevator eyes on me TWICE before shaking my hand! I was offended, but decided to pull my nice smile out and be gracious during his interview. As soon as he sat down, we started going over his application. He didn’t fill anything out! I had a grown man in front of me insisting that he’s never really worked and volunteered from time to time but he can’t really remember the dates that he “volunteered”. I asked him why he didn’t complete his application in full and he said “applications just aren’t my thing.” I told him that I required a completed application so the needed to become his thing if he wanted a job with us. I gave the application back to him along with my pen and asked him to complete the basic information.

I was so irritated that I didn’t notice the officer that just walked into the office. When I looked up, I was surprised to see him walking towards me. Before I could process what had happened, he approached the gentleman that I was interviewing, quickly stood him up and started frisking him! The other two ladies in the office that were interviewing at the moment continued their interviews as if nothing was happening, but their interviewees just kept looking at my guy that was getting arrested. All I could think is that this guy could have been carrying a weapon and I was giving him a hard time about not filling out his application!

I guess the applicants waiting in our hallways heard the commotion because the girlfriend of the arrested applicant came into HR, threw herself on my assistant’s desk and started sobbing! The officer cuffed the applicant and escorted him out of HR and to their vehicle. I later learned that the applicant was on parole and had to wear an ankle bracelet. He failed to show up for a drug test when they called him, so the officers tracked him down in our office by his ankle bracelet.

Once the applicant and the officers left my office, I turned my applicant screening form over to select the reason on why I wasn’t pursuing this applicant… I had to check the other box and write in “applicant was arrested during interview.”

This applicant’s girlfriend called back 3 times to check on the status of his application over the next two weeks.

What I love most is that the other interviewers just kept right on truckin’. That’s good HR right there.

Photo by banspy

Want to read this on your Kindle instead? Click here to subscribe.

Follow @ClueWagon

Meet the One With the Purple Glitter Pen

Kerry Scott — Fri, 11 Dec 2009 13:00:42 +0000

A colleague describes her favorite applicant of all time. This candidate:

Filled out the application in purple glitter pen
Spelled her own name wrong twice
Listed “pole dancing” as one of her special skills
Listed her high school information on the education page, along with “Got kicked out in 10th grade for fighting”
Drew a big X through Friday and Saturday on the “Availability” portion, with a note that said, “I don’t work weekends cuz I’m hung over”
Wrote “Worth a million dollars someday” next to her signature on the back

My colleague though it was a joke, until the applicant came in a couple of days later to check on the status of her application. One of her fake nails popped off while she was drumming her fingers on the counter top and hit the assistant manager in the eye.

Tales of the Cluefree appear pretty much every Friday. Past stories are here.

Photo by brettneilson

Want to read this on your Kindle instead? Click here to subscribe.

Follow @ClueWagon

Meet the Really Scary One

Kerry Scott — Fri, 04 Dec 2009 14:00:58 +0000

A colleague had a candidate who showed up about 30 minutes late to his interview. When he finally arrived, he yelled at the HR administrator (who happened to be at the front desk) that he was here for an interview and that he was late. They told him that his behavior was unacceptable, and politely asked him to leave.

On his way out, he threw the door open and punched a hole in the wall.

Clue: Don’t be late. Never be rude to the person at the front desk. If you can avoid punching holes in the wall, that’s good too.

Tales of the Cluefree appear pretty much every Friday. Past stories are here.

Photo by rick

Want to read this on your Kindle instead? Click here to subscribe.

Follow @ClueWagon

Meet the One Who Hung Up on Me

Kerry Scott — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 13:00:36 +0000

I always start my phone interview by telling the candidate what we’ll be doing. I let them know how long the interview will take, and that I’ll be typing in their answers as we talk (that way they don’t think I’m writing emails or something while they’re talking). I let them know that I’ll be asking a few basic questions about their background, and then a few questions about their experience as it relates to this specific job, and then I’ll give them an opportunity to ask questions. Most candidate are nervous at the beginning of a phone interview, so I like to let them know exactly what to expect. It also gives them a moment to breathe and collect themselves before we get started.

So I went through this whole little spiel with a candidate for an account manager position.

Then I asked the first question, which was, “Are you still working at XYZ Company?”

She said, “Yes.”

I said, “And you’ve been there since1998?”

She said, “Yes.”

I said, “And why are you looking for a new position?”

And she hung up on me.

At first, I thought we’d just been disconnected. That happens. So I called her back, and said something like, “I’m sorry, we must have been disconnected.”

And she said, “I guess so.”

So I said, “Okay, let’s continue. I think we were on this question: Why have you decided to look for a new position?”

And she hung up on me again.

Now, at this point, it seemed unlikely that it was a coincidence…but I tried calling her back anyway, because maybe there was just a problem with the phone line or something. Her answering machine picked up. I left a message. Then I also emailed her, on the off chance that it really was a phone problem (although phone problems don’t normally affect the old-school type of answering machines…but whatever).

I never heard from her again.

Tales of the Cluefree appear pretty much every Friday. Past stories are here.

Photo by embolden photography!

Want to read this on your Kindle instead? Click here to subscribe.

Follow @ClueWagon

Meet the Foot-in-Mouth Gang

Kerry Scott — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 13:00:02 +0000

Sometimes candidates say dumb things. Here are some dumb things people have said to some of my colleagues lately:

One candidate said knew he was a little “green behind the ears.”
Another candidate submitted a resume that mentioned his “gun hoo” personality twice.
A candidate submitted a resume that was six pages long and made the business case for a salesperson to “network” through golf. He wanted to be sure he’d have country club privileges, because he felt there was a direct correlation between golf and sales.
An applicant, when filling out the part of the application where you state your job duties, wrote that his previous job required him to “do the cashiers at the end of the shift.”

Tales of the Cluefree appear pretty much every Friday. Past stories are here.

Photo by hoggarazzi

Want to read this on your Kindle instead? Click here to subscribe.

Follow @ClueWagon

Meet the One Nobody F__ks With

Kerry Scott — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 13:00:12 +0000

Early in my career, I did a lot of college recruiting (i.e. traveling to campuses to recruit students who were about to graduate from college). One of the things that is especially important in college recruiting is making candidates comfortable. They often don’t have a lot of interview experience, so they’re usually nervous. It’s important build a rapport and to get them to relax a bit, so that the experience isn’t so painful. That way you get a clearer picture of whether they’re good candidates for your company.

I was recruiting for a large company, and they had a very defined recruiting process, which included a list of behavior-based questions I was supposed to ask each candidate. She had been doing great so far, and the interview was going well. Apparently I’d been a little too successful in making her comfortable and building rapport, thought, because when I asked the last question (“Tell me about a time you had a conflict with a co-worker”) she laughed and said:

“Oh, people know not to f__k with me.”

And then she froze.

And you could see the realization slowly cross her face. It was painful to watch.

She actually ended up getting hired, because I decided to leave this out of my interview notes. This was a 21-year-old who had very little experience in job interviews. She had been extremely nervous at the start, and she grew more and more comfortable as the interview progressed. We had been laughing and the tone was chatty throughout, and I think she just lost her focus for a second. It happens.

She turned out to be an excellent employee.

Not every interview misstep is fatal. It’s okay to be human. If you can avoid dropping f-bombs in interviews, that’s good, but if you’ve said something dumb in an interview, stop obsessing. Nobody’s perfect.

Tales of the Cluefree appear pretty much every Friday. Past stories are here.

Photo by platinumblondelife

Want to read this on your Kindle instead? Click here to subscribe.

Follow @ClueWagon

Meet the One Who Fled

Kerry Scott — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 13:00:30 +0000

This one comes from a colleague:

I had an applicant come to her interview and begin filling out paperwork. At some point during that process, I guess she decided that she didn’t want to interview with us anymore. She told our receptionist that she needed to use the restroom, and he told her where it was and she walked out. Now, you have to understand a little about our office set-up. We occupy 1/2 of a floor in a multi-story office building that has offices around the outside of the building and the elevator shafts right in the middle, and the floor shares bathrooms rather than each business having their own. So from our reception area, you can clearly see the elevators through our glass doors.

After about 15 minutes of waiting for her after she left for the bathroom, I asked our receptionist about it, but he had no clue. I made my way to the bathroom, and there was no one there. I went back into the office, and about one minute after walking back in, the applicant calls us. She told us that she went to the restroom and accidentally walked into the staircase mistakenly. I went and let her back in.

She AGAIN pretended to go to the bathroom, but somehow made it out of our building.

I think that she got in the staircase—not wanting to stand and wait for an elevator since we could see her—and then realized that the stairs are locked from the inside (unlocks during a fire and the lobby is open, but she obviously didn’t make it that far).

Tales of the Cluefree appear pretty much every Friday. Past stories are here.

Photo by miyukiutada

Want to read this on your Kindle instead? Click here to subscribe.

Follow @ClueWagon

Meet the One Who Wasn’t the Same

Kerry Scott — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 12:00:17 +0000

Once I did a phone interview with a candidate for a travel agent position. This candidate had a flat Midwestern accent, which is pretty common here in Milwaukee.

The candidate answered all the questions reasonably well, and there were no red flags, and she seemed qualified, so I scheduled her for an in-person interview.

When she came in, she had a very strong Russian accent…because she was not the same person. She’d had someone else do the phone interview for her.

When confronted, she said she didn’t think we would notice the discrepancy, because HR people are “not that good.” Then she said she was pretty sure she could learn to be a travel agent on the fly, because she knew how to use Windows and Microsoft Works, and she liked to travel, and (the best part) that she had been to the Mall of America twice and could book people for trips there.

Tales of the Cluefree appear pretty much every Friday. Past stories are here.

Photo by puroticorico

Want to read this on your Kindle instead? Click here to subscribe.

Follow @ClueWagon

Meet the Druggies

Kerry Scott — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 12:00:16 +0000

When I asked some of my HR/recruiting colleagues for their own cluefree tales, a lot of their responses involved drug testing. Here are a few:

One candidate showed up for an interview looking completely strung out. He could barely walk. The interviewer asked just enough questions to be polite, and then asked the candidate if he had any questions. The candidate said, “Yes, uhhh, do you guys do drug testing?” The recruiter lied and said they did, hoping to discourage him. The candidate said, “Well, I could probably pass if we could put this off for a few weeks. Would that be okay?”
Another candidate was hired, and they sent him for the drug test the day he started. The results came back with an adulterated sample. The candidate insisted this was a mistake, and asked to speak to the Medical Review Officer (MRO—the third-party medical expert who oversees this stuff). The manager, the HR person, and the candidate got the MRO on the phone. The MRO said that if the sample had indeed come from the candidate, he’d better get to the hospital immediately, because his urine had the same acidity as battery acid. The HR person and the manager looked at each other, then ended the call. The candidate quietly said he’d grab his stuff and go. On his way out, he asked if they’d be willing to give him a good reference, for one day of work, when he failed the drug test and made them call the MRO to boot. They declined.
The next candidate had actually been with the company for about four months as a temp, and kept asking when he wag going to do his drug test so he could be hired as a regular employee. Finally his day came, and when he reported to work he was sent off to do his drug test. He gave his sample, and then disappeared. They never saw him again. Turns out he had the trifecta—marijuana (which stays in your system for weeks), cocaine (which stays in your system for a day or two), and heroin (which stays in your system for a few hours). This meant that the guy had actually done heroin before coming to work that day, even though he knew he was going to be tested any day so that they could hire him. You have to wonder why he bothered to go and give the sample at all.

I also had a candidate once whose urine sample came back as non-human. This was before the internet, so you couldn’t just buy it online like you can now. You had to collect your animal urine the old-fashioned way.